Thursday, February 16, 2012

It’s been 13 years….


That is how long I have been in the kitchen beside the time I used to be a waiter since I was 16 years old. I don’t remember why I wanted to be a chef when I started it. Be frankly, girls loved a guy with cook books when I started cooking. I thought that was break threw to get laid. Only the problems is that past years weren’t my shows. I wasn’t shiny gold to bright up at the front of ladies. Maybe that is the reason I am always cranky, the person who is always not happy.

Whenever I saw a guy with ugly face and looking so fucking so lonely, I asked myself if I am that guy. really?? Why can’t I be a guy that having sex with 100 girls in a year?? Okay, if you think that I am thinking of sex too much, I think you are right. I do think I am sex addicted sometimes. I thought that I could get laid all the times when I become a chef. Yes, cooking for a girl is the most erotic thing the man can do for her. My favorite thing is that wearing nothing but an apron when I cook for a girl. I haven’t had chance, though. I want to do it!



With that basic reason, without thinking of cooking better food every day, I have only been cooking, I guess. I often embarrass by saying “I’ve been cooking for 13 years.”. When I got a big tattoo of my first knife with a sign of ‘Since 1999’, I didn’t want to put it at the first because people will ask me what is the mean by since 1999 and I have to say that is the year when I started cooking. Only the problem would be that people might think my food isn’t good enough for 13 years and wonder what he has been doing all these years. Despite all these fact that I put it with my first knife, I know it will be my wake up call, to say to myself ‘ wake up! You have been cooking since 1999, for god sake, it was fucking last century.’. I think I became more ego to be better and want to swim deep inside of the ocean because I want to swim, not sinking. I can’t really focus on only one thing, even my writing lost the focus time to time, but, if I focus on many things, I became more focused. It probably is the reason of why I have tried many things. Although my cuisine may lose some focus than 100 percent-ers, I am not only a chef. I don’t have any talents. Only talent that I have is to be different. I can’t just follow other people’s style. I like to observe few thing and then alter to my own way. Whatever I do is just me. I want to hear ‘that is Roy’. Now I want to put that in my cuisine.



This year of my resolution is to be better every day and be healthier. I am planning to go around the world to research. It would be my life study of how I want to be a good chef. I found my principal of how I want to cook at Paris last year, I always think that coming to Paris was the best choice I haven’t had made so far. My principal is very basic but in a good way. It is based on how chefs should cook for customers. If you talk to every chefs, they all say same meaning in different words. The fundamental is to cook simply, seasonally, flavorfully and, the wow fact; Just like every religions say different expressions to love someone but they all says love others.

Cooking is probably only subject to require all six senses and all other subjects. For the start with cooking needs individual philosophy to create dishes. With Artistic sense, every dishes will express the personality. Photography could show you how this food has been made and it was what you had at the restaurant. Music will boost up the everyone’s feeling of eating good food. Help from science such as physic, chemical, and biology, cooking become more interesting. Almond the side of supporting from financial, every chef could continue cooking and enjoy the life because happy chef cooks happy food. Literature could describe the food as how flavorful it is. Sport will help team working better in the kitchen, build leadership and healthier body to work in the kitchen. If there is any rejection, I will take it but I will strongly stand by what I said and I meant it.

This year, I will make the turning point of my career. I am ready for anything. As I always like say, there is always only flying sky high or smashing on the ground. This year will be the time on the ground. However, I will practice hard to fly. I am my own. In this world, no one can help me to fly because whether I can fly or not is all up to me. If there is anyone stands by me to watch me to fly, I will appreciate it. I will go to many different places to work with many different chefs in many different countries. My exciting part will be working for chef Kasumi at Lyon, chef Andre Chian at Singapore, Chef Kobe at the restaurant In The Wulf in Belgium and, cross Russia and China to go to South East Asia by train. I just want to be done everything I want to do before I nest in New York. Once I am in one place, I would be more focused on my own thing.

I grew up with instant foods, Korean food and, a lot of MSG foods. It could be the reason of why my taste buds are little bit blind. Well, my poor life could have not afford any good food. Better food means little more expensive than bad food but so fucking cheap. While I travel around this year, I’m probably not going to have enough budget to eat properly. Only descent food I can have will be at the kitchen where I will work. Sometimes, I should open my tent to sleep. I will not sell my buts but I will cook for people to continue learning and experiencing. Perhaps, people might ask me to take photo for them and I might get little money to eat something. If I practiced enough to play guitar at the front of people, I might want to do that, too. Whoever read this post, could you please notice me if there is anyone needs a cook. I will keep posting on where I am and I will be. Some of countries I might just taste my different food. In order to try many things, I definitely need some money.

Ah! Here is an idea. How about getting sponsors? Just like pro-skate boarders. I do not mind how many sponsor logos on a sponsored car. As long as I drive around France, I would not be much happier. I am not asking too much, I just want to continue my journal of ‘In Search of Perfection’. This blog will be the window of what I have been doing. Who knows? There would be someone want to go along with me. In Buddhism, everyone can be a Buddha as long as anyone travel through the life. Traveling is good thing. While traveling, you could find the pieces that you might have lost. It will also make you slow down a little bit sometimes to look back for your footsteps. I don’t want to be too pathetic of my situation this year. There is only one word for my life, struggle. This year won’t be changed it since I choose to be. I will be all alone but I will have plenty time to look for who the fucking really I am.

Now, I feel great full. I think there is nothing I can’t do. I am really a lucky person to travel around. I want to make this year worthy. I don’t want to expect too much but I want my 13th year of cooking career to be flavorful, tasteful and wonderful times. Now is the time to prepare to fly high or swim deep inside of the ocean. I am ready and my own race has already begun.

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