Thursday, February 16, 2012

Spent too much time in my room


It’s been 13 years….


That is how long I have been in the kitchen beside the time I used to be a waiter since I was 16 years old. I don’t remember why I wanted to be a chef when I started it. Be frankly, girls loved a guy with cook books when I started cooking. I thought that was break threw to get laid. Only the problems is that past years weren’t my shows. I wasn’t shiny gold to bright up at the front of ladies. Maybe that is the reason I am always cranky, the person who is always not happy.

Whenever I saw a guy with ugly face and looking so fucking so lonely, I asked myself if I am that guy. really?? Why can’t I be a guy that having sex with 100 girls in a year?? Okay, if you think that I am thinking of sex too much, I think you are right. I do think I am sex addicted sometimes. I thought that I could get laid all the times when I become a chef. Yes, cooking for a girl is the most erotic thing the man can do for her. My favorite thing is that wearing nothing but an apron when I cook for a girl. I haven’t had chance, though. I want to do it!



With that basic reason, without thinking of cooking better food every day, I have only been cooking, I guess. I often embarrass by saying “I’ve been cooking for 13 years.”. When I got a big tattoo of my first knife with a sign of ‘Since 1999’, I didn’t want to put it at the first because people will ask me what is the mean by since 1999 and I have to say that is the year when I started cooking. Only the problem would be that people might think my food isn’t good enough for 13 years and wonder what he has been doing all these years. Despite all these fact that I put it with my first knife, I know it will be my wake up call, to say to myself ‘ wake up! You have been cooking since 1999, for god sake, it was fucking last century.’. I think I became more ego to be better and want to swim deep inside of the ocean because I want to swim, not sinking. I can’t really focus on only one thing, even my writing lost the focus time to time, but, if I focus on many things, I became more focused. It probably is the reason of why I have tried many things. Although my cuisine may lose some focus than 100 percent-ers, I am not only a chef. I don’t have any talents. Only talent that I have is to be different. I can’t just follow other people’s style. I like to observe few thing and then alter to my own way. Whatever I do is just me. I want to hear ‘that is Roy’. Now I want to put that in my cuisine.